We were all so excited to find out if baby #3 was a boy or a girl. Big brother Bo was positive it was a boy. Daddy was convinced it was a boy even if he was hoping for a girl. I had even set up a poll in my classes to give extra credit to the students who guessed correctly.
I think the conditions were perfect for me to take some things for granted. With the first two, I was sufficiently nervous about that 20 week sonogram and spent more time praying for a healthy baby and less time praying the baby would cooperate so we could see its boy/girl parts. All of a sudden, having babies was old hat. Everyday. Extraordinary only because I would get a baby at the end of it all.
We knew something was up when the tech didn’t spend any time trying to determine the baby’s sex. She mumbled some excuses about having to go check her measurements and left the room rather abruptly. She hadn’t printed many photos of the baby. We were left in that room to wonder for about ten minutes when she came back and told us we needed to drive to our OB to talk to them about some alarming things they saw. But that was it.
Our OB mentioned some terms like cystic hygroma, fluid build up and genetic issues, but said she couldn’t give us any details until we had a better ultrasound done. (Why did they send us the first place if the ultrasound equipment there is so sub par?)
That was Monday, October 8th. We expected an appointment the following day to get some answers, but the soonest available was Friday. The hardest part was not telling our students what was up. We told them the baby didn’t cooperate and that was why we still didn’t know the sex. I had to bite my tongue every time someone said, “We’ll, at least the baby is healthy!”
It was a blessing that Patrick and I had to wait for the second ultrasound. In the meantime, we took a breath. We closed our eyes and when we opened them the glory of God was in front of us instead of our poor sick baby. God gave us this baby for a purpose and we felt peace knowing that He was in charge. Don’t get me wrong, we are worried and scared and sad. But we know that God’s will is right. It is perfect. It is good.
We had time to remember that God made this baby. With all of the structural issues and potential problems, God made her. Exactly how He wanted her. We were prepared to hear anything.
10 Did you not pour me out like milk
and curdle me like cheese,
11 clothe me with skin and flesh
and knit me together with bones and sinews?
12 You gave me life and showed me kindness,
and in your providence watched over my spirit.